(When these two music bars load, stop the one on the right. When it says *stop* then turn off the left one and play the right one.)
Freaky
Funguses
After a couple days of traveling,
“We have you now!” the chief goomba shouts. The chief continues, “And don’t think you can stomp on us just once to kill us! We have health-bars! Look above our heads!”. Luigi and Mario look above the goomba’s head and see an orange bar with a white boarder. The bar reads four.
Mario says to his bro, “Hey bro. Remember Mario RPG, this is just like that. Let’s just do the same thing and we’ll be fine.”
“I WASN’T IN MARIO RPG!” Luigi yells. “IT’S YET ANOTHER ADVENTURE YOU LEFT ME OUT OF!” The next paragraph is censored due to adult language such as “poopo-head”.
“O.K bro, let’s stomp these goombas!” Mario yells.
Mario prepares an attack. “This is something I learned from Mario RPG! ULTRA JUMP!” Mario jumps up high and comes down on each of the goomba’s head twice, killing them.
“Ha! They were wrong. I had to stomp on them twice!”
Luigi mutters very quietly, “I wanted to fight. It’s not fair.” Luigi fights back tears.
*STOP*
After about thirty more minutes, the brothers reach
Then Luigi sees a stranger who is not a freaky-deaky mushroom. “Who the heck are you?” he asks.
The stranger replies, “I am the writer. My name is Michael. I control the story.”
“Pssht. Yeah right.” Luigi says sarcastically.
“I’ll prove it to you then.” Michael whips out a piece of paper and a pen (not a pencil. He hates pencils) and writes something down. “Good thing you wear green clothes,” Michael says, “now they can call you ‘Green Thumb’!” All of a sudden, a flower pops out of Luigi’s hat.
“YAAAAAAAAAAH!!! GET IT OFF ME! GET IT OFF!!!!!” Luigi runs around in circles screaming. He then tries pulling the flower off but it is attached to his head. Therefore, he ends up hurting himself. “Please Michael! Take it off!”
“Fine.” Michael writes something down and the flower disappears.
“Well,” Mario asks, “can you tell us where Peach is being held?”
“No. I cannot tell you that kind of information. Find it out yourself, you lazy bum.”
Disappointed, Mario asks, “Can you at least tell us where the closest ‘All-you-can-eat’ restaurant is?”
“Yes.” Michael points behind Mario. Mario turns around and runs to the restaurant. Luigi sighs, then follows Mario. Thirty minutes later, they are kicked out for eating all of the food. The restaurant then closes because they no longer have any food.
“Well, that was good.” Mario remarks.
“Yeah well that is the third time this month that we’ve, no, you’ve been kicked out of.” Luigi remarks.
“Excuse me but I couldn’t help but hearing”.
“Who said that?” Luigi says.
“Me.” Luigi looks around and finds a toad (you know, those freaky funguses).
“Peach is being held captive by Bowser.”
“Duh.”
“Bowser’s Castle is in the East. You must go along Pleasant Path.
“Is it pleasant?” asks Mario. “Or is it just a nice and safe path that will lull us into a fake sense of security and then when we lest expect it some enemies will ambush us?”
“No, now… GO!” the Toad says, almost yelling.
“Hey Mario,” Luigi says to Mario as they’re walking away, “do you think that that deformed mushroom was telling us the truth?”.
“Luigi, say their real name, Toad.”
“But I don’t wanna!” Luigi whines. “But do you think that that frea-, oh fine, that toad was lying?”.
“Of course not! Why would he do that? He’s not one of Bowser’s minions or anything.”.
However, they were wrong. As they walked away, the toad turned around to hide an evil smile. “They fell right into King Bowser’s trap. Mwa ha ha ha ha ha ha!” The toad takes off his mask to reveal that he is a Koopa Troopa. Why he did this, I’m not sure. Seriously, if you were a spy and then yelled out “Hey everyone, I’m a spy!” you would be arrested, killed, etc. Anyway, the Koopa was arrested immediately by the MKPD (Mushroom Kingdom Police Department). But he didn’t care. He had led the two plumbers into a trap.