Chapter 20

The Snowy Summit

 

       As Mario and Luigi are about to leave the sewers, Luigi feels a cold breeze coming from the left passage they had an argument over earlier.

       “I think we should go in the left passage now.”

       “You’re just saying that because you’re hurt. Pain can make people do stupid things.

       “No, I think we should go to the left.”

       “You need Tylenol 8-hour relief.”

       “WE NEED TO GO INTO THE LEFT PASSAGE!”

       “Look Luigi. I’m smarter than you; I know we need to go back to Toad Town.” Mario says as he struggles with the child proof seal on the Tylenol 8-hour. It clearly says push, then pull, but Mario is trying to twist it off. Luigi grabs it from him and opens it immediately.

       “Ummm…”

       “We are going left.”

       “FINE! IF IT WILL SHUT YOU UP!”

       They travel for a while and encounter the monkey that throws poop. After that encounter, they desperately need to take a shower. They finally reach a pipe with icicles hanging on it. They go in it. When they emerge, they realize that they should have brought a jacket.

       “OH G-G-GOSH IT’S C-C-COLD!” Luigi says.

       “I’m not cold.”

       “W-W-WHY N-N-NOT?”

       “Because I’m so dang hot and sexy.”

       “C-C-COME ON MARIO, I J-J-JUST ATE!”

       “No you didn’t. You never eat.”

       “W-w-what about in the f-f-forest?”

       “I ate the mushrooms.”

       “…”

       “Let’s move on.”

       “L-l-let’s try to find a store, w-w-we n-n-need jackets.”

       They trek through the snow for a good forty minutes until they find a store. By the time they reach it, Mario has icicles growing out of his nose. The store manager comes and greets them.

       “Welcome to my store! It looks like you’re cold. It just happens that I have to spectacular jackets for sale! Would you like to see them?”

       Without waiting for an answer, the manager holds up two old, crusty, moth eaten jackets. To make it worse, the only thing that would fit in it is a sock puppet.

       “Do you think we’re that stupid?” Luigi says.

       “Ooo! They’re sooo cute! Do they come in blue?”

       “MARIO!”

       “Uhh, I mean, do you have anything wearable?”

       “You can wear this on your hand.”

       Mario and Luigi notice that the manager is wearing two very warm jackets. They look at each other, then knock out the manager and steal the jackets, including the sock puppet ones. To make a long story short, the Mario bros went to a fortune teller to find out which mountain the castle was on. They then went there. They started to climb, but about halfway up, Mario slipped and fell all the way back down. Once again, he claimed that Luigi had pushed him. Anyways, they reach the top and enter the icy castle…

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